I've been trying to get a blog post up for the last week. I've got many started, covering fascinating and sure-to-be popular topics such as: 'Anatomically Relevant Idioms!', and 'Hip Hip Hooray... not. When Hip Pain Strikes', and the much anticipated 'Mind Over Uterus: Using Hypnosis to Manage Childbirth'. Of course these are all working titles only, but I'm sure I've whetted your literary and chiropractic appetites.
The problem? I can't finish a damn thing. This is not writer's block - I've got plenty to say! I just can't find the words. I'm... a little slow lately. With words. And stuff. Like on any given day I usually have at least one article of clothing on backwards. Fortunately (or not, as it were) it is usually a garment not visible to the public. I recently washed the television remote control along with the duvet cover, not noticing until halfway through the dry cycle (45 minutes of CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK didn't tip me off!). I know I've done other dimwitted things, but they've seemed to have slipped my mind. My sieve-like mind.
It took me a while to catch on. Perhaps I needed more sleep? A case of premature senility? Maybe too much zinc in my diet... or would that be not enough? Why was I so obtuse (thank you thesaurus.com)?
To be perfectly frank, I had always doubted the veracity (is that the right word?) of this condition. I felt it was an excuse that the, let's be honest here, more simple moms-to-be used to make up for their... uh... shortcomings. Surely a braniac like myself would only thrive during pregnancy. I'd spend the 9 months reading up on child-rearing philosophies while mastering sign language to teach to my genetically gifted infant, and maybe finish that book on Jung that I'd started.
Well. Mea Culpa (does that make sense? Latin is not a strong subject right now either...). My bad. Apparently, you're with stupid. I've got a bad case of baby brain. My blood stream has been rerouted to the womb.
So, loyal readers, forgive me if there is greater space between posts, for there seems to be greater space between my ears. I've got a bunch of really, really good stuff started... but these days the only thing I seem to be able to finish is a meal.