Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Next year at the Chiropractor's office!

I love Passover.  It is my favourite jewish holiday for sure.  For my gentle gentile readers, Passover celebrates the Jews' exodus from Egypt, from slavery to freedom.  While fleeing Egypt our forefathers didn't have time to let their bread rise, and so Jews around the world become sort of gluten-free for one week to remember their plight and to lose a few pounds.  Note that throughout history, no Jew has ever lost a single pound during passover, because our people are an innovative bunch, and we invented chocolate covered matza.  When god gives you matza, make matza bark!

It is a wonderful holiday, filled with tradition, family, food, song and wine.  4 cups of wine, to be exact.  And being a devout jewess for this one holiday alone, I take this literally, consuming 4 metric cups of wine, not just 4 glasses of wine.  L'chaim!

Chocolate and wine aside (best holiday ever!), the International Tribe of Jewish Chiropractors has been working steadfast for thousands of years to change one small detail of the Passover Seder.  The Hagaddah instructs us at many points to lean to the left.  Various scholars that I googled postulate that we do this to mimic royalty, who themselves leaned to the left.  Some chazzers propose that leaning to the left leaves the right hand free, all the better for stuffing ones' face with more gefilte fish.  Others suggest that leaning to the right is a choking hazard, especially if one does so with a face full of gefilte fish.

We at the ITJC are tired of being flooded with calls every Nissan.  The day after passover, we ourselves are bloated and bound and hungover, and we need to put an end to incessant emergency calls from patients suffering because of this dated and dangerous custom.  Leaning to one side is off-putting to the sacroiliac joint, to say the least.  If the leaner happens to be wearing a wallet in his back pocket, I'll have to cancel my morning just to deal with the gluteal insult.  God forbid my patient has a preexisting disc injury - she's looking at weeks of rehab!  Were we freed from bondage to be delivered into pain?  We think not.

Our people have suffered enough - let's not add back pain to the list.
Chag sameach and stay upright!